I’m closing down Panel of the Week. I have a handful of reasons but they are the same as every other schlub who can’t keep at it. Well, maybe my story is a bit different. I have been hired, for very little money, to write Panel of the Week for Techland.com.

Actually, the amount of money is a yet-to-be-determined small sum. It’s TBD because I’m still negotiating the bowels of Techland’s parent company Time Inc’s HR department. Regardless of the final number scribbled down and slid across the table I can promise you it will top the $7.20 in Google Adsense revenue I’ve earned so far.

For anyone who is interested here are some figures on what it was like running POTW for six months. POTW got 5,900 visits over the last six months. That comes out to about 34 visits a day on average. The most I ever got in a day was 158 (the day I started an ad campaign on comicartcommunity.com) and of course the lowest was 0. POTW received a total of about 16,000 page views over these past six months. I’ll include a little graph of the breakdown of the pageviews here:

After the homepage you can see most traffic went to the wallpapers page. A page, it should be noted, that no one downloaded any wallpapers from. I’m serious. I think not one single person clicked on any one of the wallpapers I made.

After that the two Top 5 listicles I wrote got all the traffic. I didn’t like writing them but I felt that they would be good intro articles. Maybe I would get lucky and they would get digg or reddit attention. They didn’t. But I wasn’t really interested in doing another Top 5 blog. There’s enough of that inane crap out there.

Oh, I had three RSS subscribers on Feedburner. Two of those three, I’m quite sure, are me.

I’d like to thank the handful of you out there that supported me (Alecia, Joeybear, and there was probably someone else…). If you like the product I’m selling here please follow me over at Techland. I’ll be there till they fold or fire me.

However, if I do have some super secret fanbase out there there that’s quietly adoring my scans and insights now’s the time to change my mind. Leave a comment, email me, twitter me, etc. etc. etc. I’ll listen, I promise.

Otherwise, it was a fun ride and I’ll see you guys in line on Wednesdays.

- Mikey Donuts

In an upcoming one-shot called Invincible Returns that is coming out this spring the creators are going to return Invincible to his original yellow, blue, and black costume. I don’t think this merits its own book. I think the costume should be left in the past. In fact, the pages of Invincible are crammed with so many great costumes it’s criminal that the hero of the book runs around looking a fool. Today we are going to look at some of the costume successes and failures of Mark Grayson (Invincible) as well as his friends and foes.

Coming this Spring Invincible will be returning to his original costume featuring the yellow bits and the fingerless gloves and the knee pads. I don’t know who is demanding this. Is it not ridiculous enough that Images premier book features a title character that basically wears a costume version of the company’s logo? It’s testament to Kirkman that I actually picked up this book with this terrible, terrible costume. I’ll call this version one.

Invincible has a tailor. He has this guy, Art, who makes costumes for supers. After a while Art designs a new costume for Invincible that is minus all the silly crap from version one. Full gloves, no yellow, no kneepads. Things that should be a given. Yellow is for cowards and urine. I’ll call this black and blue suit version two, and really it’s not that bad. It still has bug eyes for some reason, but ok. This is what Invincible wears now.

But let’s step back a bit. When Invincible wasn’t even named Invincible yet he was just running around fighting crime in a costume he made himself. And you know what? It’s still better than ‘version one’. It’s got that Grifter vibe.

Before Invincible settled on ‘version one’ Art set him up in this outfit. Which, if you took those disks off, isn’t that bad. Later on in the series another hero named Bulletproof would wear this costume. Again with the yellow, but still, this is better than ‘version one’.

Not content having one member of Invincible’s family look like a jackass Art designs a costume for Mark’s little brother, Oliver. Oliver’s name is Kid Omni-Man. His costume has biker shorts and pixie boots. C’mon!

One of Invincible’s earliest allies was the boy known as Rex Splode. Rex like most characters in the Image universe has a cooler costume than Invincible. Much cooler, in fact. No exposed hair, a cool jacket, no bug eyes. Ditch the utility belt candy and I could see Invincible in a get up like this.

This is Science Dog. He is a character in one of Mark’s favorite comic books. His outfit is awesome. Invincible probably doesn’t need a backpack but it does look cool. It’s a bit 90’s but c’mon this is an Image book after all. Science Dog does really remind me of a character named Dingo that used to show up in Backlash all the time. Anybody remember Dingo?

The following six panels are from The Invincible War issue where Invincibles from many different dimensions come to pillage Mark’s Earth. Some of the designs of these other Invincibles are very sharp. Specifically the third one below, the one with the stupid mohawk, is simple, powerful, and iconic. No mask might not work for the writing but I like no masks.

Again, the third example here, the one with the full face mask is a great costume. I guess you run into the problem of being non expressive but this is light years better than version one or two.

Got an opinion? Am I wrong? Is his original suit as iconic as Kirkman thinks it is? Sound off on the comments or be heard on twitter. Follow me: @paneloftheweek!

When Marvel decided that one character running around with a healing factor and giant claws wasn’t enough we all should have recognized it as the slippery slope that it was. That was when X-23 was born, the engineered female clone of Wolverine. A few years after that we got Daken, Wolverine’s son. Now, six years after X-23 came about we have the guy pictured above, another of Wolverine’s kids. Well, to be fair, this guy lives in the Ultimate universe but still that makes four Wolverines grumbling around every month.

Marvel, let me assure you, we as readers are going to be OK. We don’t need a character with claws and a healing ability running around in every book. I promise.

Honorable Mentions

Siege #2. There was a pretty typical ‘event’ fight featured in most of this issue. It was between the ridiculously over powered Sentry and Ares, the God of War. Honestly half the book could have been Panel of the Week but I’m waiting. I have every faith that artist Olivier Coipel is going to deliver some bitchin splash pages of someone, probably Cap, taking down Osborn. Although if anyone would like to put an end to the Sentry that will be the POTW no question.

Demo Vol. 2 #1. Not unlike the two recent issues of Pilot Season I think my affinity for this Demo book is that it’s done in one. A single comic telling a single story. It’s refreshing. Not as refreshing as the art of Becky Cloonan though. It’s like shot of black and white Orangina.

Now that “Book 1″ of Kick-Ass has wrapped up I decided it was time to read all eight issues one more time. I wanted one more look at Kick-Ass being the best their is at what he does. Getting the shit beat out of him. Think about it. He’s Rocky Balboa minus the monstrous left hook. He loses nearly every fight he gets into.

So here are the top ten panels of Kick-Ass getting kicked, punched, clubbed, run-over, or just otherwise mauled. Instead of trying to actually rank these in any order (although number 6 has almost certainly has to be the winner) I opted instead to show them in the order as they appeared in the comic.

Warning, there be spoilers ahead.

#1

On one of his first patrols Kick-Ass takes on a small group of punks who are spraying graffiti. Shortly into the scuffle he gets kicked in the junk. Shortly after that he gets stabbed.

#2

After being beaten and stabbed in his first fight he escapes only to get hit by a car as he’s running away.

#3

After months of recovery from getting beaten/stabbed/run-over Kick-Ass returns to patrol and attempts to defend a man being attacked by three thugs. Technically he wins this fight as the thugs decide that he’s just too crazy to continue wailing on.

#5

Kick-Ass takes his new found MySpace fame and starts taking requests. One request sends him to a gangsters home. Kick-Ass tells him he’ll break his legs if he doesn’t change his ways and then a hooker breaks a bottle of champagne over his head.

#5

It turns out that the Red Mist in addition to being a pansy, is also a liar. He is the son of a mob boss and he betrays Kick-Ass. The remaining panels in this list are the result of Red Mist’s betrayal.

#6

Ok, the car battery on the testicles. This was technically in the first issue during a flash-forward but we don’t really get to it until issue #7. Let me just say this, have you ever seen the clamps on a pair of jumper cables? These things are huge and they have spiked teeth. Their purpose is to attach violently to battery posts. Forget the electric current just clamping one of these down on a nut and goodbye nut. That’s it. This panel makes me physically squirm.

#7 – #10

Presumably after having his balls mangled and fried by a car battery THEN the mobsters go to work on him. Kick-Ass enrages his torturers with insults in attempt to get them to beat him so savagely that the chair he is tied to will shatter. That’s his plan. Now it should be noted that as a result of getting demolished by a car his head has metal plates in it as well as regions of dead nerves which prevent him from feeling pain. So I guess this plan make sense.

Bonus Round!

As issue #8 wraps up Kick-Ass finds the nerve to tell the girl he secretly loves how he feels about her. It could have gone better.

The Taskmaster is great example of a character that has original powers and style but no one really knows what to do with him. Perpetually cast as a mercenary and a trainer of henchmen he hasn’t found his voice just yet. Of course, that might be because he wears a skull mask for no reason and a white cape and hood.

For those not familiar, Taskmaster has the power of photographic reflexes. Once he sees a person perform an action he can duplicate it flawlessly. Unfortunately Tasky is featured so infrequently in comics that every time we see him his power set has to be explained. As it is in the first three pages of this issue of Avengers the Initiative. He has no other powers. No super strength, no super speed, no super durability. Which leads to the logical question of how he duplicates moves by Cap, Spidey, or Daredevil? All of whom are supers.

In a limited series Taskmaster was featured in a few years ago he amps up his own abilities by watching kung-fu movies in fast forward. I thought this was brilliant. I suppose his lack of super mojo explains why he runs around with a sword and shield. Well, in that limited series the style was distinctly Agent-X manga, pictured below. Overall, a much better aesthetic for a kung-fu/black-ops kinda guy.

Unbelievably I can’t find any pics online of when Deadpool went after Taskmaster’s secret ninja school in Deadpool #2. This will always be my favorite Deadpool series and his fight with Tasky was classic. It was drawn by my boy, Ed McGuinness so both characters looked great (if slightly over muscled). I’ll keep looking and bust out the scanner if I need to. Never mind, I found it!

Honorable Mentions

Hey! It’s Captain America! What you can’t see is someone off panel saying, “Hey Look! It’s Enrico Pallazzo!” That someone is me. Because I don’t care. We’ve known for weeks, if not months, how this series wraps up. Captain America: Reborn #6 (of 5), you are extraneous.

The end of Siege is really only three issues away. I would like to see Dr. Doom be the one to take down Loki at the end. Sure he’s arrogant and yes, Doom is an asshole but he does it with old school style. And he’s been beaten enough, here by the Odinson in Thor #606. Let’s get this green-hooded sonuvabitch a win huh?

In Superman Secret Origin #4 we see an origin story for the popular Superman villain Parasite. This time around the super glutton actually looks like a disgusting fat body. It’s just so obvious I’m surprised we’ve never seen a take on him like this before.

Punisher #13 featured more ridiculous Frankenstein Punisher (Frankencastle) versus monster hunter horseshit. But once again Tony Moore is drawing the pictures and it looks cool. Again. Dammit.

Flipping through Kick-Ass #8 I was struck by just how many spectacularly violent panels there were. In fact, for my next Longbox post I’m going to go through all 8 issues and pluck out the best panels. For now though, here is the Red Mist getting his face smashed into a red mist of blood. Oh. I get it. Sneaky.

Oh, and one more thing. Last POTW I mentioned how I adore fastball specials. Well, just one week later we get another one. This time it’s Frankencastle chucking Man-Thing! From now on I will document all fastballs I find on this site and I will tag them #fastballspecial.

Path is a fable, I think. It has talking animals and someone learns a lesson I’m pretty sure. Which is what makes a fable a fable, no? When Doppler the rabbit is on the run from a pack of crocidogs he is saved by a tumbling elephant named Dodge. Nothing solves a problem like dropping an elephant on it.

When I came across Path I was a bit surprised I had not ever heard of it. Despite the fast pace of both the story and the action on the page something about the adventures of these two unlikely companions was compelling. The whole affair is very Seussian. Every page introduces a new predicament with new fantastic creatures both large and small. Gregory S. Baldwin is both the writer and illustrator of the book and his style is quite unique. The adventure is suitable for any age but the art has a distinct urban, almost graffiti-like, slant to it.

The disparity between the simple story and the edgy art ends up suiting the book well. Had any of the more menacing creatures been rendered in a more cartoony style some of the urgency of the two travelers would be lost. Below are some panels of the unnamed inhabitants of the world of Path.

Technorati Tags: Path, Com.X, Comic Books, Comics

I know, I know, I just did a post about a Hulk fighting the Fantastic Four. But now Fall of the Hulks is really (like, totally) getting into full swing and dammit Ed McGuinness is behind the wheel. I can’t say no to him. I would read a Gossip Girl comic if he drew it.

Well besides Rulk fighting The Thing over, get this, a misunderstanding what else happens this issue? I can tell you one thing that doesn’t happen. We don’t find out who the hell Rulk is or why he’s working with Banner. At this point I never want to know who he is. I want the Red Hulk’s identity to be the Marvel equivalent of Wilson from Home Improvement. Let’s get downright silly with it. Let’s show his real identity in silhouette. Let’s show it in off-panel reaction shots. Let’s show it in surveillance video obscured by static. You wanna screw with us Marvel? Well then REALLY screw with us. Why not let the Red Hulk change color at will? Make Red Hulk Bruce Banner’s twin brother! Make him the Void! Make him Bill Foster! Make him Steve Rogers! C’mon do it! Do it now!

Ok, I’m done.

Honorable Mentions

I don’t know why I’m buying the Mighty Avengers. It’s like an episode of the Benny Hill show. I feel like every fight scene should be played in fast forward with the accompanying trumpet riff in the background. The Sentry vs a giant sized Absorbing Man? Really?

I will admit I am enjoying Hercules being on the Mighty Avengers team. I will always support a fastball special no matter who is involved.

Joe is a loser and an outcast in his school and his life as a teenager in Joe the Barbarian #1. It’s a crying shame. One day he finds himself in a world populated by life sized versions of his action figures. Basically, the best thing that ever happened to anyone. If this happened to me as child I would have beaten the shit out of Pidge with his own green helmet and taken his spot as the left arm of Voltron. Screw gym class!

Finally, in Hulk #606 Marvel gives us a back up story to justify the $4 price tag. This story is an excuse to have She-Hulk and Red She Hulk (She-Rulk? Re-Hulk?) vogue at each other while just barely containing their perfectly spherical sweater kittens. How are there not more girls reading comics. I don’t get it.

This is Elsa Bloodstone. She’s a monster hunter and she rolls with twin shotguns as well as twin uzis. Not even sawed-off boomsticks either. These are full stock and full barrel angry instruments of justice. Ms. Bloodstone is part of the Nextwave team and her British patience will only last so long.

Nextwave is a team of minor Marvel heroes that revolt against their employer to fight against their employer’s employer. Got that? It doesn’t matter. A robot, an ex-avenger, a monster hunter, a mutant, and super powered screw up battle over the top enemies in over the top fashion. It’s pure parody and with Warren Ellis writing and Stuart Immonen drawing it’s just great comics.

Well, shit. It looks like Ampersand over at the Weekly Crisis just did a post about Nextwave. Unbelievable! On the same day! And what’s worse is they got double page scans of the huge fight scenes at the end of Vol 2. How do they do that? My scanner sucks. I guess we’ll have to settle for team introductions here at POTW.

Roll Call:

Tabitha is a mutant with the ability to create time bombs that she detonates by muttering the catch phrase ‘tick tick tick BOOM!’

Aaron Stack, better known as Machine Man, puts robot rights first and fleshy humans second. Or any mammal for that matter.

The Captain, or Captain #$@% as he originally called himself, doesn’t remember his real name but it’s ok. He’s wicked strong and he can fly.

Elsa Bloodstone is a second generation monster hunter. She’s strong and fast and durable and quite, quite British.

Monica Rambeau, previously the afro’d Captain Marvel of Avengers fame, leads Nextwave by just barely putting up with the rest of the squad. She can also turn into lasers beams and stuff.

Technorati Tags: Nextwave, H.A.T.E., Comic Books, Comics

Darrick Robertson, the man behind the ‘The Boys’, took on everyone’s favorite barbarian with this Conan one-shot. Shortly after Conan buries the woman he loves he goes looking for blood. And when Conan loses himself in battle it’s bad the other side.

The Weight of the Crown is a story of how Conan comes to sit on his first throne. After battling as a mercenary Conan inherits a King’s crown on the battlefield. Inherits is the wrong word. He takes it from a weak prince. In typical fable fashion Conan lavishes on his throne at the expense of his lands and new people. But as his subjects die and his crops wither he’s forced to face the facts that presidenting is hard. I won’t spoil the ending but obviously his post does not last long.

One of the conditions of telling an entire story in one issue of a standard comic is cramming a lot of story on to each page. As a result we don’t get many of the delicious splash pages that we love so much here at POTW. Dark Horse saw fit to include some concept sketches at the end of the issue. Here we really get to see some pin-up love from Robertson.

Technorati Tags: Dark Horse, Conan, Cimmerian, Comic Books, Comics

This is what happens when you piss off The American. You get your jaw punched off. Right off! Cla$$ War was part of a wave of ‘wide-screen’ comics back in 2001. Joined by titles like The Authority and The Ultimates Cla$$ War favored violence and an anti-government sentiment.

Cla$$ War, written by Rob Williams and drawn by Trevor Hairsine (later by Travel Foreman), follows the lives of a team of super powered soldiers that operated in the Gulf War. Shortly after, The American, goes rogue from a US government that he feels has been lying. The man missing his jaw in the above shot is Heavyweight, one of American’s former teammates.

Trevor Hairsine drew the first three issues of the series and Travel Foreman took over for the final three. It was one of the few times when an artist change didn’t bother me. In fact, I think I enjoyed it more after the switch. After the first panel below you’ll see a distinct style change, that’s Foreman.

Technorati Tags: Cla$$ War, Com.X, Comic Books, Comics